Friday, October 31, 2003

Day Five: Seeing Life from God's View

I have always held the same belief as the first line of this chapter: "The way you see your life shapes your life." I pride myself on being a positive person in most circumstances, and I always try to see the good in other people or situations. Of course, there are times when I fail in this and let a frown cross my face or mumble unpleasantries here and there.

The concept of a life metaphor was a bit more difficult for me to grasp. I sat here and thought for a while, and realized that probably 20 or more times a week, I will hear myself telling people, "It will all work itself out." My employees at work can even finish the sentence for me when I start it. But...I believe it! By trusting in God and working to live my life according to his will, it will all work itself out!

It has been hard to keep that in my mind on some occasions though. During the video simulcast we watched at the church, Rick Warren talked about how growth comes from trials and tests. The book echoed this saying that we are always being tested, and that these tests help build our character. In my Weight Watchers meeting 2 weeks ago, one woman said that she always heard "never pray for patience" and I asked why (because I had never heard that saying) and she said, "Because God will give it to you for sure!" meaning that a test will be provided that will allow you to gain patience by overcoming it. Some days (weeks, months, etc) I feel tested ALL the time. And perhaps I am. But sometimes I feel so overwhelmed I just have to stop and pray and ask God to help me through it.

Gaining God's trust with what he has given is something I need to continuously work on, but feel I am beginning to get a handle on. I have generally been one of those people that felt I, alone, accomplished all that I have...never paying tribute to the silent partner that was with me each step of the way. As I grow more in my walk with God and begin to build his trust in the smaller things, like tithing, I am sure I will see more tests and opportunity to build trust present itself.

Thinking About My Purpose

Point to Ponder:
Life is a test and a trust.

Verse to Remember: "Unless you are faithful in small matters, you won't be faithful in large ones." Luke 16:10a (NLT)

Question to Consider: What has happened to me recently that I now realize was a test from God? What are the greatest matters God has entrusted to me?


Early this spring and summer I was likely as far from God as I have ever been in my life. I am not quite ready to go into it all publicly, but I think I failed nearly ever test given to me, and just when I thought God couldn't get any farther away from me, he spoke to me and pulled me back. I am so thankful now that I listened to the Holy Spirit and worked to overcome my situation at the time.

As for the matters that God has entrusted to me...I honestly am not sure. The whole stewardship concept is still a bit tricky to me, but I plan to do some thinking about this one.

Note: I have archived each day's posts, so that only the current day's thoughts will be on the main page...please click "Archives" at the top of the page to read past thoughts.

Thursday, October 30, 2003

Day Four: Made to Last Forever

It is good...refreshing even....to know that this life is not all there is. Often, however, I have lived as if it were. As the book noted, living in light of eternity will begin to change you. It will begin to create new priorities for you and your life.

I wrote an article for a newsletter that goes out to members of my department last year. We all work with college students and employ a large number of students on our staff. I had just had a particularly difficult conversation with a staff member that resulted in them being placed on probation for a choice they made with regards to their job. That same day I had to write an article, and I ended up writing about the concept of personal choice. So much of what we do, think, say or how we behave is a choice. We let things such as our family, friends, church, work, etc play a part in those choices, but the point of my article was...how often do we let the consequences of the choice actually influence us when we are making it? Unfortunately not very often for many of us.

I want to change that for myself. I want to stop living for the here and now, and start living for eternity. I want to know that the things that are important to me are important to me because they are important to God and are part of my purpose in life. I want to see the "big picture" of my life rather than a snap shot of right now.

Thinking About My Purpose

Point to Ponder:
There is more to life than just here and now.

Verse to Remember: "This world is fading away, along with everything it craves. But if you do the will of God, you will live forever." 1 John 2:17 (NIV)

Question to Consider: Since I was made to last forever, what is the one thing I should stop doing and the thing I should start doing today?


I think there are a lot of things that I would like to stop doing. I would like to stop questioning everything and be more accepting of the way some things are in life. I want to stop putting up barriers and allow my values to change. I want relationships to be more central to my existence, and I want my walk with God to be central to my life.

I want to start living for eternity.

Note: I have archived each day's posts, so that only the current day's thoughts will be on the main page...please click "Archives" at the top of the page to read past thoughts.

Wednesday, October 29, 2003

Day Three: What Drives Your Life?

That was easy for me to answer even before I began the chapter and before I read about the five most common things that drive most people's lives.

Fear

I can not count the number of times in my life that I have failed to act, or held back on something, or not taken a chance on something simply because there was some kind of fear within me. I can only imagine all the opportunities I must have missed out on in my life.

I also found that the other 4 things that commonly drive people are things that I fall prey to as well. I have a hard time letting go of things in the past. I find myself constantly asking God to ease my mind or to help keep my thoughts from turning to things that once were. I ask instead to have my mind focused on the possibilities of what can be. Yesterday I even wrote about how I think that all of our past experiences in life make us who we are today, and while that is true...what I found as I was reading today is that, as the book said...while we are products of our past, we do not have to be prisoners of it.

I need to let go. I need to look past the things I have done in my life or the things that people have done to me, and start looking towards the future and what could be possible if I can focus on God and discover my purpose in life.

I can not tell you how exciting it would be to not be focused constantly on the need for approval, or how scared I am of what may be, or what has happened to me in the past.

Imagine this...

Living my life with meaning!
Less stress!
Simplicity!
Motivation!
Security of my eternity with God!

Show me the dotted line....I am signing up!!!

A particularly important concept that I pulled from the book was that "hope is as essential to your life as air and water." I can not tell you how true this is for me. If I did not have the hope that God was going to exercise his will in my life, the hope that I might find my purpose, or the hope that I would become a better person and have meaning in my life, then...well...I can't say that I would have much left at all.

Thinking About My Purpose

Point to Ponder:
Living on purpose is the path to peace.

Verse to Remember: "You, Lord, give perfect peace to those who keep their purpose firm and put their trust in you." Isaih 26:3 (TEV)

Question to Consider: What would my family and friends say is the driving force of my life? What do I want it to be?


Darryl and I talked a lot about this question after we got done reading tonight, and I can not really say for certain that my family and friends would be able to say what a driving force in my life would be. I am not even sure I can say what it is. I think I would like to think about this some more, but I know that ultimately, whatever God's will and purpose for my life is....THAT is what I think I would like it to be.

Tuesday, October 28, 2003

Day Two: You Are Not An Accident

There have been so many things about my life that I have wanted to change. My weight, my hair, my occassional shyness in groups, my status as an only-child. I can think back over the years and check off a long list of things that I have wished were different about me at one time or another. Some things, like my weight, are things that I actively try and change...others I simply "deal" with.

It honestly never occured to me that I am the way I am because God wants me to be, or because He made me this way.

People who get to know me well and learn about all the details of my life have asked me before if I would ever want to go back and change anything if I could, and I always answer the same way.

No.

I truly believe that I am who I am today because of all the things I have experienced in my life. I would not change my parents, events that have happened to me or things I have experienced because they all happened to me for a reason. It was all part of God's plan for me and who I was to become.

One thing that stood out to me in the book was the sentence, "God also planned where you'd be born and where you'd live for his purpose." This is something that my husband and I have talked about often...why we are in Terre Haute, Indiana.

We moved to Terre Haute in 1997, away from all of our friends and family. We came here because I got a job at Indiana State University which enabled me to work on Master's Degree. When my degree was completed, we stayed in Terre Haute because Darryl and I both found good jobs. Now, seven years later after we arrived, we often wonder why we are still here. We have talked about moving back to Kansas to be with my family, or to Canada to be with his family, but there is something that is holding us here in Terre Haute.

Terre Haute is also where we found the church we now attend, and is ultimately the place where we have found the 40 Days of Purpose. Perhaps God placed us here for a reason...our purpose perhaps. I can't say for sure, but it is definitely something I think about.

Thinking About My Purpose

Point to Ponder:
I am not an accident.

Verse to Remember: "I am your Creator. You were in my care even before you were born." Isaiah 44:2 (CEV)

Question to Consider: I know that God uniquely created me. What areas of my personality, background, and physical appearance am I struggling to accept?


As I mentioned before, there are lots of things I would like to change about myself. I have been a member of Weight Watchers for just over a year now, and have lost 82 pounds. I still wish to lose more. I think that it could be possible that God designed me to be "not skinny", but I still struggle with this part of my life. Perhaps there is something for me to learn about this part of my life that I haven't learned yet. Or perhaps I will reach my ultimate weight loss goal and my journey itself will be an insipiration to others. Perhaps my ability to be successful in this one area of my life will enable me to be successful in other similiar area of my life. All I can do is pray and trust that God will guide me.

Another area that I have talked to Darryl about that causes me some concern sometimes is how I often am "emotional" in "spiritual" settings. We always joke that I cry at the drop of a hat and if you give me a good Hallmark commercial on TV I can cry you a river. I find that expressing my spirituality with others is difficult, but maybe even in that God has a plan.

Note: I have archived each day's posts, so that only the current day's thoughts will be on the main page...please click "Archives" at the top of the page to read past thoughts.

Monday, October 27, 2003

Day One: It All Starts With God

I think this was the perfect chapter for me. I am definitely one of those people who think self-help and personal growth of any kind comes from within myself. Reading that first line, "It's not about you" was exactly what I needed to read to help me open my mind and heart to the fact that this is a journey to discover God's purpose for my life, not my own.

I will admit that a few things I read made me a wee bit nervous...especially one thing I read in the introduction to the book. It was written that a journey is always better when it is shared. I tend to be a very private person. It has always been hard for me to share my thoughts and feelings on personal matters...sometimes even so difficult for me to share that it keeps me from opening up to my own husband. But, as it also said...real spiritual growth is never an isolated, individualistic experience.

I NEED THIS.

There...I said it! I need to be more open about my growth and my walk with God...for myself and for others. I have never had that before.

After we read the first chapter, Darryl and I were talking, and I said that knowing how I am...I need to be very careful not to approach this book and this study just from an intellectual perspective. I generally find it very easy to use my mind as I deal with things, always keeping my heart and my emotions neatly tucked away. I want to make sure I am keeping my heart open to this whole experience.

Thinking About My Purpose

Point to Ponder:
It's not about me.

Verse to Remember: "Everything got started in him and finds it purpose in him." Colossians 1:16b (Msg)

Question to Consider: In spite of all the advertising around me, how can I remind myself that life is really about living for God, not myself?

In one of my classes at college, I remember a professor discussing how we live in a "market place of pleasure." Everything is aimed at how we can gain pleasure...food, material possessions, wealth, etc. It is increasingly difficult for people to separate what they need from what they want or desire . What I need is to be fulfilled, to know the direction for my life, to know I am doing God's will. Twenty pairs of shoes, a new car or a fat paycheck each week isn't going to make that happen. It might make me feel better for a little while, but will it really ease the longing that my soul has? No.

page 19, "But being successful and fulfilling your life's purpose are not at all the same issue!"

Note: I have archived each day's posts, so that only the current day's thoughts will be on the main page...please click "Archives" at the top of the page to read past thoughts.

Sunday, October 26, 2003

For the past few weeks, Darryl and I have been talking about whether we wanted to do a new bible study at our church or not. We are not yet members of the church, but have been visitors off and on since we moved here in 1997. It has only been during the past 2 months that we have become regular attendees.

The new bible study is called, "The Purpose Driven Life" and is based on a book written by Rick Warren. This morning we were assigned into a small group and this evening we attended our first evening worship at the church and watched a video that previewed the study.

I was truly touched by God and moved by what I saw and heard there this evening. I am truly ready to find God's Purpose for my life....and that is how this blog came to be.

In the video we watched, Rick spoke of how we each have abilities that we possess that can be used in our mission and ministry. I thought about what MY abilities are, and my web design and technology skills were immediately on my mind.

I have long enjoyed using the web to reach out to people, and after a discussion with my husband, I decided to start this blog as a way for him and I to write about our experiences with this bible study as we actually go through the study. Whether the blog will be kept up after the study is over, I do not know....but I felt strongly compelled to put my experience out there for people to share.

You will see posts here from me (Charity) as well as my husband (Darryl). There is a comments section at the end of each post, and you can feel free to post your thoughts or send us email directly at OPDL@mouck.com.

Tomorrow begins our first day of the study, and I am eagerly awaiting my next post!